I Identify As A Porsche

So you bought a Tesla to save the planet, impress your neighbors, and embrace the future.

Then Elon went full Twitter villain and now… you’re stuck with a car that screams “tech bro” instead of “eco hero.” But fear not — your Tesla doesn’t have to be a Tesla anymore.

Introducing the “I Identify As A Porsche” sticker — the rebranding tool for every Tesla owner who’s mentally checked out of Elon’s empire.

Why it’s perfect for you:

• Reclaims your ride’s identity — because your Tesla is just a misunderstood Porsche at heart
• Adds +10 horsepower in spirit (no guarantees)
• Saves your paint job from protestor key strikes with humor
• Turns cringey assumptions into chuckles in parking lots

Whether you’re escaping Elon’s drama or just manifesting German-engineered greatness, this sticker is your Tesla’s new truth.

🛒 Order now and let your Tesla live its best Porsche life.

Because technically, identity is fluid. Even for cars.